To WA governor, lawmakers you’re all just a bunch of compost

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Washington Gov. Jay Inslee, one of two dozen Democrat wannabe presidents, just made it official: You’re just a big pile of walking compost.

Inslee signed legislation making the Evergreen State first in the union to legalize what is politely called “human composting,” according to the Seattle Times. If only actor Charlton Heston were still alive to jump onto the silver screen declaring “Top soil is People!”

Washington Gov. Jay Inslee just signed “human composting” legislation for the Evergreen State. (YouTube, KCTS)

Inslee, who is currently running virtually dead last for the 2020 nomination on a climate change platform, has been preaching against carbon emissions. According to Yahoo News, the “eco-friendly governor signed a bill to that effect in a bid to cut carbon emissions from burials and cremations.”

Fox News carried the story as well, explaining that a project called “Recompose” will involve construction of an urban “organic reduction” funeral home where human remains will be reduced to compost in a process that “involves using wood chips, straw and other materials” and takes about four weeks to complete.

According to the Fox report, this began as something called “The Urban Death Project” in 2014. It’s an intriguing effort, but it’s almost guaranteed to become a punchline on late night television. It was detailed in a 2015 article in The Stranger, an alternative Seattle newspaper.

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Under the new law in Washington, which does not take effect until May of next year, the process of “natural organic reduction” will be recognized as “an acceptable means of disposition for human bodies.”

Washington lawmakers on both sides of the aisle voted for this legislation, 80-16 in the state House and 38-11 in the state Senate, according to the Seattle Times article.

No doubt, this will add a new dimension to the term “pushing daisies.” No longer will anyone be covering you with dirt. You’ll be the dirt covering someone else. If you enjoy working in the garden now, just wait. You could actually become the garden.

In all seriousness, the Fox story quoted Troy Hottle, identified as “a fellow at the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency, who explained that this method is “as close to the natural process of decomposition [as] you’d assume a body would undergo before we had an industrialized society.”

Nora Menkin, executive director of the People’s Memorial Association in Seattle told Fox, “It gives meaning and use to what happens to our bodies after death.”

Apparently, this technology is building a following, perhaps not the same as cryogenics, but from all indications, a lot of thought has gone into this.

The Times noted in its coverage that Washington State already has what are generically referred to as “green cemeteries” that allow burial without embalming, caskets or even headstones.

In short, you might just disappear completely. Not even the IRS could find you. There is just one question. Will you still be able to vote in Chicago?

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